TSG Feature: Holy Grail Matrimony
Holy Grail Matrimony
Opening ceremony: Dear steady TSGers, we are gathered here today to bestow upon our readers insight, tips, and the effects of sneaker collecting in relationships and marriage. While most of us in relationships may enjoy the freedom of nurturing our hobby freely, many sneakerheads have made the transition from jumping in line on days end for a fresh pair of kicks to jumping the broom and starting a family. From deadstocks to wedlock.
Have you ever alienated your significant other to get online and access the latest sneaker news or overlooked quality time for a sneaker release or event? I willingly admit that I have. No doubt being a sneakerhead, you’ve probably been sicken with this dilemma many times, but there lies a cure. Sneaker aficionado, DJ Clark Kent said, “I already had 5,000 pairs when I met my wife and that’s when I started giving my sneakers away…I can’t spend the way I used to now that I’m married”. It’s important to know marriage is a well balanced give and take relationship.
Before partaking in the “tie that binds” and not your shoelaces, but in marriage, it would be beneficial for you to introduce your significant other to the sneaker culture. Relay some of your knowledge to them, tell him or her who Tinker Hatfield is, explain why it’s dangerous to wear vintage kicks, and school on how to spot fakes. ObsessiveSneakerDisorder (OSD) originator, Dee Wells shares, “My wife thought it was crazy to collect kicks until I took her to places like the Nike ID studio on 255 Elizabeth Street (NYC) to design her own kicks and to the Sole Collector event in Boston. That’s when she started to gain respect for the sneaker culture.” In retrospect, find ways for your relationship and sneaker collecting to coexist. “Buy what you like, but family come before kicks. [Shoes] can never replace friends or family”, Dee also added.
Marriage is the act of two beings operating as one; her family is your family, his wealth is your wealth, and if you have the same size and taste in kicks, then his soles are your soles. Matrimony is the alliance of the souls right? That may also mean soles too! Have a serious discussion with your man or lady about how you would like your collecting and relationship to be a healthy network. Offer options, while being open to suggestions as to how the two may operate in a productive manner. Have time to spend with your mate and set aside time at the end of each day or the end of each week to conduct your sneaker routine. Don’t assume you’ll make time for your significant other, instead have clear a objective in doing so and take proactive steps in seeing that this is done.
Before meeting my girlfriend, I thought that no one was going to come between me and my kicks. It was going to be me and my Jordan 1′s until the end. Until deathcreases do us part. That wasn’t until I begin to enter a somewhat serious relationship with thoughts of one day being wed in the future. When you’re in a relationship with someone that you plan spending your life with then everything else falls by the waist side. While as most relationships can withstand anything that is thrown into the mix, some are on the verge of cracking like OG midsoles. Don’t make your significant other feel that they are in competition with your sneakers for your attention or affection. Find a healthy balance between your hobby and better half. It is fairly easy to immerse yourself into the shoe game and become unaware of the effects it has on the people around you. If you’re in a relationship or married, it’s important to remind yourself that no matter the brand name, exclusiveness, colorway, or price, that they’re just sneakers at the end of the day. Only once that is realized, you’ll be more prepared to tie the knot. Pun intended.
Feel free to share your thoughts.
Posted by: Corey “xxcoreyxx” Egleston
Images: SoleCollector
Category: Features
As long as the bills are paid & children + dog is fed, gas in the car, & food in the fridge….Off to the mall/boutiques/moms&pops I go….All about Priorities mayne!!
xxcoreyxx, Did this? Boy, yous a fool for this 1 here. Nothin but respect. Good words too no doubt….
really nice article corey. I must confess, before G I didnt know a whole lot about sneakers. I thought that collecting was just a cute hobby that he would prolly grow out of w/ time, now i find myself knowing and understanding a lot more b/c he explained “the art of collecting” to me. Even though in marriage two become one, it is important for each to maintain and express individuality as well, that is how you remain unique. I will not mind my “shoe-boo” spending money on kicks as long as everything is done in its proper perspective…yes, we will look nice, but if we cant see our shoes cuz the lights are cut off..it just makes no sense. As a woman, I can say that we dont always understand men and im sure vice versa, but when someone takes time to educate you on something they care about, it makes you care about “it” and them more…all in all, no one wants to come 2nd to an object. so in any relationship, make sure that persona always feels like they come first. Sometimes women feel like they have to compete, so in retaliation, they ask you to give up something that you love. If she feels like you would give it all away for her, then 9 times out of 10 she wont ever even ask you to give it up b/c she knows she already comes first.
I wish my ex could read this she never tried to understand the life of a true sneakerhead but i guess that is why shes a ex. lol
I never really put shoes over women in my life, unless the relationshit was going to a dark dark place. However I do believe there should be boundaries as to accepting what your partner is into, and that you should never try to change them for that. My boundary is food off my plate… don’t you dare ask for a French fry Girl!
great article xxcoreyxx witty wordplay i must say dont buy kicks unless the bills are paid you got DJCK & Dee Wells in there?!? WOW good job man.
i gotta tell u thats a great thing to do u gotta give it up someday but that drives me insane getting married with some clean uh shoes j’s, forces dont matter but thats amazing
This is definitely a touchy subject Corey brought up. I was in a relationship that went sour partly due to the fact the girl thought kicks were going to be the death of me. Hard to kind of seperate myself from em when it is my profession. The collecting part didn’t bother her as much due to the fact I was trying to share my view so she could understand. I do indeed think whoever gets the Mrs.Corporate title she will be supportive to a certain extent. You gotta prioritize though! DON’T COP UNLESS YOUR PRIORITIES ARE TAKEN CARE OF!
Dang PJ, that’s how you felt? LoL just playing. Great work Corey and job well done. I think this is a topic we (sneaker freaks) never think about. Some of us live for the moment and never think about the future, or in some cases we might be so selfish that we could care less about having to slow up on buying in the future. If you got the big bucks like that and your wife doesn’t mind…ball on playa. However, in a world where the #1 or #2 reason for divorce is financial problems, I think it’s best to spend wisely because sneakers are just material substance. I plan on buying sneakers for the rest of my life, but not as many as I buy now. I have sneakers that I wear, and I can honestly say I have some sneakers that are an investment. The market prices go up and down, but I’d like to think I invested in the right kicks.
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It’s cool if you wanna do the sneaker thing until you grow old and grey just as long as you keep everything in it’s proper perspective. I would never buy a pair of kicks before I pay bills, to me that’s common sense, but common sense isn’t so common to everyone (so sad, but true). In marriage I think you should get your wife’s opinion and blessing when wanting to cop a new pair, but even I have to ask myself “do I really NEED these”. The answer is often no, but I sometimes buy them anyways. I’m long winded as HECK, so let me end it like this. Once you get married and if you can afford it and really want the sneaker, AND get your wife’s approval, buy them. Just know that with everything in life you need BALANCE!
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I PLAN ON HAVING A WONDERFUL MARRIAGE WITH MY WIFE, not sneakers.
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P.S. – My kids will be fresher than fresh too. I already got baby heat on deck.
CenValCali, it takes way more than that to secure your stability in the future. That mentality will barely get you out of your 20′s. I’m not preaching, I’m predicting… and of course, Just sayin.
Y’all seen that episode of “Seinfeld” where George Costanza eats hoagie sandwiches while having sex? Well, I lace flip while getting busy with the old lady (nightly son!!!)….she thinks I’m being kinky and tying her hands up, but actually her hands are caught up in a bunch of extra laces I stuffed under the pillow….that’s called sneakerhead multi-tasking for you
non-educated mofo’s…..
For real, my wife knows the deal….Family first, everything else is secondary. She also knows I’m a motherf***ing addict, and to not even try to stop the sneaker thing….just let if fester and grow…..I actually got her (somewhat) into it, although it’s not on the level we’re at…..but she’ll grab a new pair of Dunks or Coach sneakers to match her handbag collection without a second thought….and my kids (no lie) get up 15 minutes early each day so they can figure out which kicks they wanna wear to school….they know it’s not REALLY important, but they enjoy it just like daddy does…..as a fun hobby, nothing more, nothing less. Me and the old lady are Federal Gov’t employees too, so we have our house/bills paid for, and don’t have a car note, so as far as money, we’re good…..if we had to pick between kicks and living in the dark, we’d be rockin’ dirty Chuck Taylors like a motherf***er….
well i feel everybody on the prioritize deal u gotta do thth no 2 ways bout it and i ask my girlfriend (we aint married but we have 1 kid and she already had 2 when we got together) if she cool w me dropping cash for my kicks and she is cuz now shes into it as well not as hard but its getting there but all bills paid first and if u got kids yours or otherwise and u cant afford to put them in wht u got on as well then u dnt need the for u now dnt go buying them every package that comes out cuz kids are kids and wnt take care of them but they still need to be as fresh as to a certain degree or u dnt need them on your feet either
that was a great read. i feel like if my girl/wife has a problem with me collecting and buying sneakers then maybe she’s not the one for me. after the bills are paid for and the bank accounts are filled it should not be a issue in my eyes. it would be nice to hear from more females.
Well life always comes before sneakers! I’ve always kept the bills paid and ect, but if I had any extra it was gone straight to The Shoe Game. When I was single it was whatever I want, whenever I want it. Now that I am married and have a daughter, the obsessive coping of shoes has died down some. No lie, I still get what I want, but now it’s more of priorities. Instead of getting EVERYTHING I see, I focus alot on grails and such. I still get on TSG once or twice a day to check up and make comments, but it does’nt run my life so much anymore (the shoes, not TSG, LOL). I did introduce my then wife to sneakers in the early days. So now she stocks a few pair herself. Also before my daughter was born she had about 20 pairs waiting on her, OG 8′s, 12′s, 13′s and everthing. I think she will like them like I do, which my come back to haunt me when she’s older, LOL! I’m into sneakers for life though so sometimes I just gotta put my other habits aside for them!
P.S. I’m supposed to be working right now but where am I at….. SNEAKER HEAD FOR LIFE!!!!!
P.S. If I ever get down on my luck, find me on eBay, JK lol!!!!!
Great Job Corey!!! Keep it up my man!!! You know OSD got your back !!! Give that man a contract G-Roc LOLOLOL! Seriously though, great piece!
^ Jay “Old Peachtree”, I feel ya kin folk….I’m in my early 30′s & got miles to feed & then some (Bun in the oven; due in a couple months,& a Godson who thinks I’m a walkin Visa card)….I ain’t have to do anybody dirty or did any dirt to get to where I’m @ today. I surround myself w/individuals who “get it how they live it” cuz its the only way they know how to eat. I can easily hop on that game durin these drastic times, but I ain’t that foolish cuz they talkin Football numbers if u land behind “the walls.”(been there,done that) I’m a certified overhead crane operator mayne. Yea, its a warehouse job & bout to shut down soon. Thats where experience come to play & what u could show & prove to the next company….Yadadamean? I’m hungry, but sure as he77 ain’t starvin….
Great article honestly It gives me a diffrent prospective, and i kind of see i might be putting to much attention on J’s than my sig. other…but then again I am still young!!!! LOL
Wow Corey, that article was Great. Very Witty! You made me understand the the late phones calls on OSD and standing in line for hours, that my significant other does. You honestly gave me a different prospective on it
My wife and I were married in May of 2001. I wore Spacejam 11′s and my wife wore White/Columbia 11′s.
^^^Dang DELUXE, dope combo! I got married last year in DMP XIs, my wife loved the idea. She accepts the addiction, and I agree that your girl must be “informed” of the habit way before the relationship gets serious. I love that my wife knows it’s simply apart of who I am, but at the same time, I know as a married couple, we have priorities. I do what I can when I can.
I jus got into the game about 2 yrs ago and its a whole diff. world, but its cool tho. and I been wit my girl for a yr and a half and we’ve been seperated for a whole yr. and now that I’m about to go back down south (to the A) I don’t kno how much I’ll be able to get down there so I’m gettin a lot of stuff while I’m in NY (had to pass on the krypto’s tho cuz I don’t camp). but I kno my girl wouldn’t approve of all the spending I’ve done this yr only, but once we reunite ima calm down some (like I have said that before lol). and I don’t really wanna turn her on to the kick game cuz I’ll rather see my girl in heels than sneakers. and when I have kids I kno ima really calm down and I won’t be coppin them any hot shit until care about kicks cuz kids are HARD on shoes. but I kno my what’s important, nothin comes before my livelihood or the livelihood of my loved ones.
Its very cool to have a girl thats into sneakers. We are on TSG all the time checking on news and release dates..im more into the game than she is tho but its all good..But like the first commentor said about priorities..take care of that, then collect.
My girl knew i liked sneakers before gotta take care of responsibilities first she says i put em before everything but now she wants a different pair of shoes every week…. Thats wat im talkin bout and i can never see me gettin rid of shoes really even if its 5,000
I’m getting married in June, and I’ve been teaching my fiance about the shoe game for several months now. She hasn’t caught the bug entirely, but she definitely has a greater appreciation for kicks. She managed to get a pair of Eminem Jordan II’s for me, and that seemed to increase her interest. She hasn’t given me any flack for all the kicks I buy just yet…hopefully that won’t change.
Im 32 and wifey gives out verbal sometimes about the amount of sneakers i have. She also knows that she met me with a collection.
Matter of fact when we met she was the manager at finishline in northlake mall so she use to give me the discount on sneaks before we were married,she would also have her friends at wish hook me up as well, so i can’t see why she started changing. I think maybe she’s thinking long term but we have the house,cars etc. what else is there to accomplish?
We love each other the same as when we first met but i know her problem with the sneaks is the space its taking up.
Yo G-Roc this is the dopest article/post. I was rolling when i read PJ response. PJ know how serious i was @ GState when it came to my kicks. What ever happen to the phrase “Chicks and Kicks”…Cant we jut have em both? Oh, I 4got im not permitted to call my wife and chick anymore after i say “I do”. Like erbody saying on here…pay ya bills, make sure home is good and all is fine!
P.S.
Dont make him pick between you and the shoes PJ. NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
What up Blink!
AInt nuthin homie. Ay just bcuz i dont leave comments anymore, don’t think i don’t check da site out daily. Im on it cuz! lol, ay i got a pro-bono idea for ya. Itz heat. ALso deem dudes at VInny sneaker spot by way of BK said show em some luv. lol
Hey Marcus
!!! Yes you can have borh…there,there…now get off the floor and wipe ur eyes hun…You read that comment all wrong. It was more focused on ppl, male or female, who put things B4 their mate. I think the only reason (unless a total crab) why someone would ask a mate to choose is because he/she feels like they have to compete thats why it is important to involve him or her in what you love…
Good article.
I’ve got stories about relationships and shoes. But yeah haha.
Damn smh everything said on here makes total sense to me, prioritizing with your money, paying off bills first e.t.c all makes absolute total sense and Im pleased as a sneaker head to see so many rsponses to this issue that we all face in our lives, if it aint your girl, its your wife or parents coming at you sideways with your sneaker habit. This was a really good post and im pleased to be a part of it. Thank you TSG, very much appreciated. Shout out to G-Roc
thats not a problem 4 me and my dude cause were both jordan heads
True that man! I took my gf to the shoe convention in Seattle and explained it all to her. Seen some peeps I knew and had a few drinks in the grown folks section. (big up to THE WAR ROOM!) She got a feel for my passion and I bought her a fresh pair of AJ1′s. So now she keeps me laced to keep me happy. What more can a sneakerhead ask for? Luv your woman fellas and the kix will come. REAL TALK!